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Journal2020-02-15T06:17:28+00:00

Birthday Party Anxiety

Haddie Bo Bo,This time next week I will have lived through your 1st birthday.  I had started planning your birthday before you had even past away.  I have a lot of anxiety when I think

We look like a normal family.

Haddie Bo Bo,Since you have died I have met several parents who have lost a child.  What's crazy about that is many of them I had known or already met them but I didn't know

I have a secret.

Dear Haddie Bo Bo,There are so many 1st's I have to experience after you passed.  I hate each one because they remind me that life moves on and I have no choice.  This weekend we

It was like Christmas

Haddie Bo Bo,Last night your Mimi came over.  Of course we talked about you with smiles and tears.  Somehow I started looking at the pictures on her phone.  I came across all these pictures of

Our baby gone.

Haddie Bo Bo,How crazy is it that I find myself looking at a website for grief support for parents who have lost infants.  How is this happening, Haddie?  Is this my reality forever? Last night

Dear God

Dear God,Today I cry as I do everyday because my sweet daughter has been taken from me.  For whatever reason you chose not to save her so here I am having to figure this life

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